why bother, its all i got to say... why bother.
i see the structure failing, i see every single fucking crack in it a mile away
and smell the stench of probability a second after, it gets so ironic.. if i care to remember what happened a few moments back
should i crack it.. ? should i fix it up... shall i laugh first?! or smile after. but the moment wont pass


im in a better position then i've been in a long time, maybe ever
im even doing the job- and am good at it.- yet am ashamed... a comfortable hole in the system is not for me -soz.
theres no way out yet nowhere to run - ionno which troubles me more, or which is it that comforts me.
i try not to think of it, am successful there.. for i still haven't,
haven't been thinking at all, its the one thing that scares me tbh- thinking..
the constant-, futureless- anticipation pisses me off, or least gets my blood flowing

i'm thinking of switching to programming, mostly cuz the girls there are cute heh
i'm.. nowhere, just where i'm used to be ( read my convo w/ barak on the previous entry if you really care )



well, whether you been reading- whoever you are -thx.

am glad you found me madde. am glad your finally happy, keep it up. really like your art too ^^